This weekend was terrific! I got to see my family, I spent time with friends, and I was able to worship in my home church. Why then was I 30 seconds from crying most of the weekend? Why in the world was I so exhausted the whole time? Why did I spend half my flight from Chicago in tears? Talk about ridiculous. I can count on my hand the number of times I've cried in the last few months, so I hate the fact that this weekend seemed to be such an exception. There were some things said and done that did bother me, but it shouldn't have been to the point it did. The one upside to this, though, is that as the flight wore on, it became clear that I needed to just let this rest in God's hands. No matter how many times I "learn" this lesson, I have to keep going back to relearn it.
This morning when I came into class the note from the sub was not good. I was so upset and embarrassed by my kids. The only thing I could think of is how to make sure they knew just how upset I was. This is when a song started running through my head.
He's still working on me
To make me what I ought to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars
The sun and earth and Jupiter and Mars
How loving and patient he must be
Cause He's still working on me.
If my God is so loving and patient to continually teach me, over and over, that I need to let things be in His hands, then I need to exhibit that same patience with my kids. I was singing the song all the way till 2:45 and it made such a difference in my attitude.
I know this is long (congrats Anne Lynne for still reading).
I guess by writing all this out, the 'why' for an emotional weekend has kinda been answered.